an intermittent series featuring narratives from emerging writers, poets, and artists.

Colton Adrian on “Conflict”

It is so much easier for me to imagine the worst possible outcome of a situation rather than the best. I can see in the darkness far clearer than in the light, and yet that is not my intention. I’m not a negative person. I’m not religious either, but I’m not depressed or anything.


Photo by Colton Adrian

It’s just describing what could possibly go wrong or bad or evil comes with a much more natural touch to me than drawing some happy handholding scene in my head.

Though I know wrong and bad and evil aren’t who I am and happy handholding is what I must desire deep down. It’s as if my mind is attracted to chaos.

As if it searches for conflict and is quite unsatisfied, bored even, if an image of peace arises instead. Albeit, I believe I’m not the only one … the only mind that’s dirty and dark … but such a mind is common if not expected of the human condition.

Which in there lays the beauty of it all. That the natural state of my mind, our minds, is in a rapid flux of questioning.

Now the way the mind seeks conflict leaving no stone unturned is certainly due part to instinct and design for any intelligent species desires to know the dangers of a situation before getting physically involved in it. Yet, the beauty I speak of is the fact that we can even acknowledge conflict. We know danger and wrong and bad even exist. We can confront chaos and walk beside it.

I do say we in the sense of us as a culture that has become so stereotyped and defined that each and every individual is screaming to be just that: an individual.

This something is not new or unnoticed before, but it is something that will soon lack importance.


Photo by Colton Adrian

I fear for the next generations in the decades to come. I fear not only for them but also for the world’s stories and struggles. For it’s music and soul, desperation and relief, for it is only conflict that creates these things and without that conflict where is the emotion? I fear the years to come will bring an undeserving feeling of victory to a generation of benchwarmers who thumb through Twitter half of the game.

If I had a single word to tell these people of the future, the future human population, I would simply say acceptance. Despite every moral or optimistic quote they’ve recently pinned or posted, they should (we all should) have open arms to struggles and confrontations and negations. That though they shouldn’t indulge in the bad, they shouldn’t ignore it either.

A story without conflict is just too easy.

Most of all, I just fear that this fact will be forgotten, but that’s just me thinking of the worst possible outcome again.

Colton Adrian is twenty-two. He plays with dirt at work and writes when he’s not doing that. He escaped via C-section and was birthed in Williamsburg, Virginia. He’s been there ever since and has been plotting a breakout involving a pen and a pad for the last two years.

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